Just Because You Can Doesn't Mean You Should

I would like to speak about a topic that I'm rather sensitive about as I see our society getting farther and farther away from this etiquette consideration.

It's polite to be aware of who is within our earshot when speaking about certain topics or using particular language.  

Something that has most definitely changed in recent decades is the manner that women and men will speak in the presence of those of the opposite sex.

Today it seems like there are little boundaries about conversation.

Let me give you a few things to consider.

Gentlemen, its not polite for you to speak about vulgar topics, use foul language, or speak about gross or inappropriate things when you're in the presence or earshot of ladies.

Recently I was stuck on a crowded bus with two gentlemen standing right in front of me wearing prestigious suits and holding professional briefcases.  They appeared to be quite the gentlemen.  Then they started speaking.

They began a discussion with me standing right in front of them, that was anything but appropriate.  I thought to myself, "I wonder why they think it's okay to speak like that in front of me?"  It was obvious--they didn't respect me or themselves enough to watch their tongue in front of a lady.  Let me remind you something about manners.

Manners are not lists of dos and don'ts.  They're an outward expression that shows how you feel about yourself and those around you.  That's why it matters.

Ladies, it not polite to speak negatively about men, use foul or inappropriate language, or speak of feminine health issues in the presence of gentlemen, especially those you don't have a close personal relationship with.

As ladies you want to seek helping those around you feel comfortable, and as you speak in a way that is ind, generous, and gracious, others will be more comfortable in your presence.

Both ladies and gentlemen should be careful to keep their conversation positive, upbeat, and cheerful when speaking at the dinner table.  You want to be a source of strength, encouragement, and positive energy to others, and the way you use your tongue will most definitely be a source of strength or a source of weakness to yourself and others.

Do your best to be aware of those around you when it comes to your language and speech.  

Yes, this is a free country, and yes, you may say whatever you want to.  Just because you can doesn't mean you should.

Restraint and respect are two traits that every gentleman and lady has.  Do you?

Monica Irvine

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